Tag Archives: anecdote

11-year-old Haley Joel Osment pitch an idea to Steven Spielberg

The year is 2000. The world has survived the Y2K bug and Steven Spielberg is about to start shooting his new film, A. I. Artificial Intelligence.  The story, written by the late Stanley Kubrick, features a world in the late 21st century, a world where global warming has flooded coastlines, and a drastic reduction of the human population has occurred. The main character of the film is David, a 12-year-old childlike android.  ai_artificial_intelligence_xlg

In the role of David we see Haley Joel Osment.
It is day one of shooting and Haley Joel Osment slowly approaches Steven Spielberg.
The young actor who rose to fame two years earlier with the film The Sixth Sense is excited to talk to the director, the person who made his favorite movie, Jurassic Park.

Only minutes before filming his first scene Osment is eager to say something to Spielberg that has been bugging his mind for the last couple of days. The 11-year-old child is of course nervous, he is about to point something out to the director, something that could be taken as criticism. Something that Osment believes that Spielberg has forgotten to include in the character description of David, the child android. But something that Osment has been thinking about.
Osment knocks Spielberg on his lower back.

Osment: “Mr. Spielberg?”
Spielberg: “Yeah, what’s up Haley, are you ready for the first shoot?”
Osment: “Yes, but I had this thing I was thinking about… Something I wanted to ask you.”
Spielberg: “Yeah, what’s that?”
Osment: “Well, I do not believe that robots can blink, or I’ve never seen one do it, have you?”
Spielberg: “Hmm, no, I don’t think so.”
Osment: “So I think it would be better if I didn’t blink at all, during the movie. Since I’m playing a robot in a human body.”
Spielberg: “I never thought about that. Wow, well, do you think you could manage that?”
Osment: “I think so.”

Haley Joel Osment is never seen blinking in the movie A.I. Artificial Intelligence.

Steven Spielberg and Haley Joel Osment, 2000.

Steven Spielberg and Haley Joel Osment, 2000.



Noel Gallagher goes record shopping in Australia

The year is 1998. The Gallagher brothers are continuing their coke quest around the world on the infamous Be Here Now-tour. The third Oasis album sparked a world wide inverted embargo that was exported to five continents for a total of 83 gigs. Nothing would ever, in the history of Oasis, come up to the same level of madness as the Be Here Now-tour. The album itself was made in haze of glory and if everything was super-sized on the album it was nothing compared to the tour.

The place is Melbourne, Australia. The British band first flew in to Perth from Hong Kong, a trip that caused younger brother Liam to be banned for life from airline Cathay Pacific. Liam’s rebuttal on never being able to fly with Cathay Pacific again was concise and clear; “I’d rather walk!”.

The band is drinking heavily during their Oceanic leg of the tour and one day Noel Gallagher wakes up hungover yet hungry for music. He goes for a stroll to find a good record store. The rest of the story is his to tell.

I went into this shop and picked out a load of records. I had a spectacular hangover but was in their for over an hour. These records were in fucking great nick, all vinyl. So I put them on the counter and this bloke said, “Can I have your name please?”. So I said it was Noel. And then he asked me for my last name and I said “Gallagher”. He punched it into a computer and I thought, “this is a bit fucking fascist!”. He then asked if I had an address, and I said, “Yeah, in England”. Then he told me my name wasn’t coming up on the computer and I said, “Why would my fucking name be coming up on your computer?”. Then he said, “Because this is a library”. I left all the records at the counter and went back to the pub where I should have stayed in the first place. 

Watch this interview for an insight in Noel Gallagher’s state of mind during his Australian spell in 1998.

Coke, Death, Roasts, and Greg Giraldo

Whenever a celebrity dies I have a feeling that my own inevitable death comes closer.
It’s a big chunk of a reality check when someone famous dies, because if the immortals die, so do we. And in the shadow of the death of actor Philip Seymour Hoffman I came to think about one celebrity death that really affected me. The death of comedian Greg GiraldoGreg Giraldo

I discovered Giraldo through the Comedy Central Roasts. The events held twice every year to honor some washed out celebrity that needed air-time enough to say: yeah sure, they can verbally shit on me on national television.

Giraldo was always the first roaster on stage. The reason for this was simple – he was always the best. If the dais included eight people telling jokes you most likely would find two people bombing, five people doing well, and one doing great. That one was always Greg Giraldo. Hence the production company wanting to kick off every roast in style, Giraldo was always up first.

In 2006 Star Trek hero and author William Shatner was the center of attention at the Comedy Central Roast. Two of the comedians on the dais were Greg Giraldo and Artie Lange. Lange famous for battling demons and drug use throughout his life met Giraldo at the JFK airport in New York. They were both scheduled on the same flight down to LA for the taping of the show. As Lange approached Giraldo he could see that something was wrong. Giraldo, spastic, blurred out: “Fuck Artie, I’m off the wagon. I’ve been on a three day coke binge, I can’t do this man, I can’t get on this flight. I’m not gonna make the roast!”.

Artie, having experienced the same in his life, but sober at the time, calmed Giraldo down and told him, “we will make it Greg! I’ll make sure we get down to LA safely”.
Making sure they got seats next to each other on the plane Lange provided Giraldo with Valium and talked to his fellow comedian throughout the flight. Giraldo survived but was at the time of arrival in LA so strung out that he directly called his dealer. Lange held on to Giraldo and forced him to bail out on his drug-meeting and instead follow him to the hotel.

He checked in together with Giraldo and followed him up to his room. In the hotel suite Lange stayed up forcing Giraldo to take a shower, another Valium, and go to bed. After talking Giraldo to sleep he stayed in the room to make sure he stayed put. When waking up in the morning they enjoyed a big breakfast together and Giraldo, tearing up, thanked Lange for his companionship and that he helped him through his extremely tough time.
They took a taxi to the venue and Lange ended the cab-ride by stating to Giraldo, “I told you we’d make it!”.

After being introduced by Seinfeld-actor Jason Alexander, Giraldo, as always, was the first roaster to enter the stage.

Giraldo, energetic after a full nights sleep, took the stage with extreme confidence. He opened his roast by saying:

“Artie Lange is here! Artie Lange, you fucking drug addict!”

Greg Giraldo died of an overdose in September of 2010. 
Story told by Artie Lange in WTF podcast with Marc Maron.